Dear Starbucks, why do you insist on trying to make me say things in Italian, like some kind of prick?
This morning I went into Starbucks, ordered a Caramel Twatiato or whatever the shit, woman behind the counter's like "what size? I'm like "the biggest you've got", she's like, "venti?" I'm like "the biggest you've got." Bitch is like "venti?", I'm like "like a large, the biggest you do." She's like "VENTI?". I'm like "LARGE." Bitch is like "VENTI", prodding a cup at me. I'm like "LARGE". She goes to make my coffee shouts over at the other goon "VENTI caramel whatever". FUCKING BITCH. I WILL NOT BE MADE TO SAY VENTI. And what's with the Italian shiz anyway? They're an American company selling a South American product. WE WILL NOT BE MADE TO SAY VENTI. OR GRANDE OR WHATEVZ.
Bunch of shits. The Marmite and cheese toasties are good though.
This is about as spot on a description of Starbucks I have ever read.
ReplyDeleteI mean, Barista? A bloody Barista. You've just made that up you muppets.
I always feel a right prick asking for a skinny(!) wet(!) medium (refuse to do the grande bit) latte but if you don't speaka da lingo then they get the order wrong.
Bloody Starbucks.